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Tuesday, February 21, 2012

real men wear pink.

I don't know when it started, my love of men who wear pink. Maybe when I was a little girl playing Barbie dolls and the only Ken doll we owned not only perpetually wore the same floral shorts but had just one shirt to his name - a pink button down.

But...I learned over time, to love something about a man wearing a touch of pink.

They say real men wear pink, right?

Yeah, I still love a man in pink.
But I see now (Barbie doll days long gone) there is so much more than appearance that makes a guy a real man.

 When I was in college, I remember a conversation I had with a small group of girls in my dorm. We lived on a Christian college campus full of young men who said they loved the Lord. But, that night we all shared our discouragement with the guys we were getting to know. We compared notes about our bad experiences... one too many run-ins with less than our "ideal" types of guys. We exchanged disappointing stories we could only laugh at after the fact. "When a guy I went out with wouldn't even help an older lady up a staircase, do you think he's gonna treat me like a princess?!" I asked. The sweet brown haired beauty sitting across from me wailed, "Most guys are jerks!" and the head-nodding and words of agreement from the rest of the group proved that, sadly, most of us in the circle had come to this very conclusion.

"I just feel like my standards are way too high" the spunky soccer player next to me said, disappointed. Thinking about my mental list of "ideals" for a man, I joined in - "I feel that way too. It seems like my dream man doesn't exist." An older, wiser girl in our little circle asked me, "Erin, what are the qualities you've always wanted and prayed for in a man?" I thought for a moment and answered, "Well...someone who is kind, caring, gentle,  thoughtful, unselfish...who values integrity, honor and strength. A man who treats me like a princess."

My older friend smiled. "All those qualities you want... who are you describing? Who embodies these qualities?"

" one we know! Maybe, Prince Charming from Cinderella?" I laughing replied.

"No... " she smilingly said. "Jesus Christ!"

My thinking changed that night. I realized - the Lord put the desire in my heart for a man who was just like Him! We ended our little conversation with prayer. Asking our ultimate Prince, Jesus to mold and shape the men who would someday be our husbands into His likeness. Not men who are flawless, perfect and never make mistakes. But men who love the Lord and try their best to be like Jesus.

As time wore on that semester, our nightly chats over homework and strong coffee were often about our ideal men. And we began to realize that we needed to ask ourselves: are we acting in a way that encourages the guys to stand up and be strong, honorable men of God? Or are we tearing them down in the way we act, talk, relate with them, or dress?

Sadly, there are more than a few sleaze-balls out there. And I think we've all run into them at one time or another. Christlike men who treat women with respect, honor and dignity are very rare gems. But they do exist. Just a few of them.

Like these two brothers I saw in concert a while ago. Joel and Luke (in the band For King and Country) spoke such precious encouragement to young women (quite a few years have passed since the words they spoke, and marriage and relationships have since come into their lives) their wisdom is so precious:

"We have a heart for raising respect for women.
We believe that under God, you are princesses and deserve to be treated with
honor, dignity and respect.
...if we had one encouragement for each of you -
especially you single ladies tonight it would be:

Don't settle for 2nd best.

Don't settle for anything less than what God has for you when it comes to men.
Because let me tell ya - he may not be there in the timing that you want or in the way you want like on ...
Pride and Prejudice...but he's there.
And God's timing is the best timing, amen?
...your Holy Hunk...your Prince Charming - he's out there.
And coming from two single men who are waiting for their 'holy hunnies',
take it from us - it's worth the wait."

photo via

*you can find the video here.
*check out the band's website here & listen to some music. (they're one of my very favorites!)

 And to you few guys out there who might be reading: don't settle for second best, either.
Wait for the rare woman who will respect you, honor you, guard your purity, love you for who you truly are and not what she can get from you.

Remember, ladies - as unrealistic as our ideal men may seem in this world,
we trust the God who is the ultimate example of a Prince.

"God laughs at odds. No matter how big the dream,
how huge the request, how lofty the hope, or even how statistically impossible the task,
He can do it -- and infinitely immeasurably more.
May God be seen for how great He really is!"

-Ephesians 3:20, paraphrase.
paraphrase by authors Eric and Leslie Ludy

And just for the record, I still think real men wear pink.

A pink tie, a pink shirt - I'm in love! A pink pocket square?
And the pink-wearing gentleman treats women right? Heavenly, I tell you.

Stay strong, my dears
and keep your standards high.




  1. Amen! Amen! Amen! You keep encouraging the ladies, dearie! You are such a light... & I'm so glad to know you! Your man is coming! And he is going to be SO very blessed!

  2. AMEN SISTA TWIN!!!! :) So true. I want to meet mine ASAP!!!!

  3. So need to hear this! I love it :) Weird, God must really want me to hold out for a man that seeks a heart like Christ because it has been everywhere lately. Definitely feel encouraged to pray for a godly and honorable man! :)

  4. Ah this is so great Erin. Between you and the other Erin this week you guys have just inspired me in this area of my life. Absoluetly love that you totally get where I am at.
    "God laughs at odds. No matter how big the dream,
    how huge the request, how lofty the hope, or even how statistically impossible the task,
    He can do it -- and infinitely immeasurably more."
    This just inspired me so much! yay!

  5. Hey thanks for your words of encouragement. I just wanted to let you know your writings are so needed. Thanks for encouraging ladies to guard their hearts, stay pure, and wait for the right one. This is so needed and I am glad that you can share this! Keep it up girlie!!!!

  6. You are so right!!
    It's just so hard to cling to what's the best when Satan is constantly showing is just the good. We can't settle for the good, but the better in life that God brings!!
    Thanks for yiur words! :-)
    Xoxoxo TJ

  7. Amen sista! :) Just today my brother walked out the door with a pink shirt on. We admire and respect the guys who wear pink out there.... You had such great and amazing points.


  8. i was one of the lucky ones...i found an amazing christian man... hes my husband :)

  9. They are out there! God wants to bless you! Patience and trust! Us girls are worth it!

  10. What a lovely and encouraging post for all the single ladies!!! keep on waiting for the very best and in his time girls..its worth it:))

  11. Erin, I'm so glad you found me on twitter so that I could find you blog. This is such a meaningful post, especially at a time where I see more and more young girls "settling" in relationships. You're sharing such a powerful message. Thank you <3

  12. AWESOME!! (: I lovee King & Country!!

  13. Wow this was simply a beautiful post. That is something that has been on my heart for many girls. I wish I would have realized this sooner but I'm glad God brought me a man who loves Him more than he loves me.

    You have a great blog! :)

  14. Another good one, my dear! It's so important to remember not to settle, even when it seems like "the one" is never going to come along. I've always said I'd rather be single, than choose poorly and go through what I've seen a lot of my friends go through.I hope you have a lovely weekend full of joyful and happy things! :)

  15. "holy hunk" haha :) so cute! this IS SO TRUE! you have got to wait for the right one, and he's out there i promise! never settle for anything than the best. because lets face it...forever is a long time to be married to someone :) thanks for this beautiful girl!


sweet friends, share your heart.

"kind words are like honey...sweet..and healing.." -proverbs 16:24.


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